Hoping for a Breeze

She lives. She returns. She posts.

I wish that after a 3- 4 week absence I could say something wildly insightful and deliciously moving... but alas, I find that the old adage is true. The hardest part of each endeavor is the beginning, and I have spent the last month feeling a bit overwhelmed with the whole "change my life" plan.

I am working with Walking in the World, the sequal to The Artist's Way. As such, I get up each morning and handwrite pages in my journal. I'm still working on the "weekly walk" part. I find that one of the arts that is really coming up for me right now is photography. I've always loved experimenting with it, but it has been years since I had a really good camera to play with. I'm trying to let myself explore colors and images... but one of my favorite joys is to take the camera to the zoo and see if I can capture a good shot of the animals.

I was accepted as a volunteer at the LA Zoo. Have gone through my training and can begin acquiring hours as soon as I get back a negative TB test result and have my fingerprints done. Additionally, I was included as part of a behind the scenes tour of the Long Beach Aquarium. Got to go above the tanks and feed the fish. But more excitedly, spoke with a gentleman who is charge of volunteer coordination, and will be in further touch with him in order to begin volunteering in the Animal Husbandry department down there. Next Monday, I'm going to an Orientation at the San Pedro Marine Mammal Care center. I still need to fill out my application paperwork in order to volunteer for Best Friend's local adoptions.

On Tuesdays, I spend my day at the Soultree Motion corporate offices, helping Dirt organize and update the "new direction" for the dance studio. Tuesday nights, I still teach my class. These activities are the only ones that bring in money, so far. The financial situation is survivable, but definately challenging and a wee bit stressful.

I heard back from school... My application materials were recieved and I have cleared the "5 pre-req" hurdle. YAY! I am now officially "in the running" for the 2008 class. There's informational meetings in March, and the list of those accepted will be released in May. Until then, I'm on pins and needles, and trying to get as many animal hours in with my various volunteering spots.

The ever-changing Southern California weather is driving my sinuses batty. The cats seem happier with someone home more of the time. Truffles is enjoying the nip in the air, and throws his jingling bunny-ball around in a one-man volleyball game most mornings around 7am. In short, life is continuing to move forward, although sometimes it is a maddeningly-slow pace.

I dream of sitting in the jungle, observing the great apes. I long to own a Nikon D-80, so that I might capture wild untamed life, abundant on savannah plains in Africa. I want to get SCUBA certified, so that I can dive at the aquarium.

So many plans, hopes, and dreams. It is hard to focus in all directions at once, pushing each a little bit. Like running with several kites behind me, waiting for the Universe to blow a swift wind under the "right" one.

Being & Becoming

From "Words of Wisdom for Women" by Rachel Snyder

Be

Remember that life is in the being, not the doing. Be every bit of everything that you are. Be tough, be soft, be dramatic, be subdued. Be a little bit of this and a little bit of tha. Be the one who always shows up on time or be th eone who lives according to her own inner clock. Be the one who never forgets a detail or be th eone who never remembers. Be happy when you feel like it and be sad when you are down.

Be who you are-- not who they told you you should be. Be able to cry in front of someone you hardly know, if it's time to cry. Be willing to be real. Be talkative if you are; be quiet if you are not. Be ready to drop your masks and your protective armor and be genuine. Be in the moment. Be in the light.

.... And just when they think they know exactly who you are, be prepapred to be something altogether different.

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Class was good today. Stirred my soul, moved my aching body (damn the migraines... damn them all to hell), and allowed me for a moment to slip the surly bonds of the everyday, and just Be. I wish the same bliss for you today.